Are you lazy? Are you useless? Don't want to get a job? Well then, you're in luck, because this self-help book will teach you how to make easy money!
1. Get A Job
2. Write Self Help Books
Writing a book might earn you lots of money, and if you write a self-help book, you don't even need any talent! Just pick a topic and spew some nonsense! You don't even have to understand the topic! Amazing!
3. Buy Self Help Books On Earning Money
Oops! Publishing error! This should be in my next self-help book: How to Lose Massive Amounts of Money Due To You Being An Idiot
4. Get A Job
Get a job! Get a job! Get a job! Get a job! Get a job! Get a job! Get a job! Get a job!
5. Kill People
You can take their money afterwards! Sucks to be you if they don't carry a wallet! Ha! Ha ha! Ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha! Ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha!
6. Get A Job
Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha! Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha! Ha!
7. Steal People's Personal Information!
This one is really easy because people are idiots! Just start a website and then post advertisements around the web! And then ask them to come to your website and put their names, dates of birth, credit card numbers, and other personal information!
8. Rob A Bank!
Just go in and start shooting people! Robbing a bank is that simple!
9. Get A Job!
Just go in and start shooting people! Going to work is that simple!
10. Start A Website And Post Advertisements All Over The Page For Ad Revenue! And Then Spam Your Page All Over The Web!
Show it to yourself! Show it to yourself! Show it to yourself! Make a virus and force other people to look at it!
11. Write A Book And Create Fake Reviews And Paraphrase Real Reviews!
Speaking of which, did you know how well received this book is?
"Es muchos buenos!" ~ Half Of The Population Of Mexico
"This book is.. the quality of a real book. I want to.. chose this book and.. read this.." ~ Famous Reviewer Matt Kushat
12. Write Something And Make People Pay To Read The Rest Of It!
488 more tips availible in 500 Ways To Make Money Besides Getting A Job: A Self-Help Book For Lazy And Useless People: The Book!